Thursday, May 22, 2008

Collin on the Least Coast

A report from the WW/Fuentes rep in DC (picture formatting is his fault, not mine):

Hey boys. First race coming up on Saturday in Delaware. $25 entry, it's on a private estate, cash for the pros, and no license necessary, sick!

Highlights from yesterday: I rode in Maryland, saw where they test dairy cows, scammed the DC parking system, and saw two men kiss on the street.

As for training, my low elevation for the day was -11 ft., I sleep at +100 ft. Does that count towards the adage: train low, sleep high?

Today I attempted to head over to some singletrack on the outskirts of town. The guidebook actually rated the trail as difficult and showed some pictures of some nice looking 1 track. However, they added, "allow for plenty of daylight because the neighborhood you have to ride through to get there is very bad." They also added "bring your armor." The sentence is a little ambiguous as to whether the armor is for rocks and tree protection or stopping bullets. Anyway, it was getting dark and looking like it might rain, but I thought I could make it and assumed the neighborhood couldn't be that bad.

As I rode through the neighborhood things weren't looking that great. At one point I rolled past a parked suburban and the driver dropped out a half-full mancan of Icehouse beer onto the street, a bunch of people on the stoops were drinking Maichelob, and everyone stared at me... There was also lots of yelling between the homies and their "babymommas", lots of enormous Cadillacs, and plenty of trash and broken bottles...pretty sweet. The funny thing is that the brand new Washington Nationals baseball stadium is literally two blocks away.

I proceeded to make some wrong turns and the neighborhood got worse looking, so eventually I had to cut my losses and get out of there. Yeah, the little colorado springs cracker was getting his chamois all in a bunch, that's for sure. Maybe I'll come back on a nicer day, I think I know a better route now to get to the trail. I guess I could also look up a place to get some gold up in my grill and some spinners on the 29er, you know, for street cred. Maybe a 12" sub on the bike could work too.

For your viewing pleasure, I am leaving you with a picture representing my love for our great nation, and a picture in front of this really nice house in the middle of the city. I hear the guy inside likes to ride mountain bikes, maybe he'll go with me over to the ghetto.



Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...


I live in Arlington, right across the street from Lincoln and Washington Memorials. I avoid SE DC like the plague and normally head south if I am looking to get some mountain biking in. Yes, it's a very nice brand new baseball stadium, but the gentrification of that area is not complete and it's still the wild west just four blocks away - as you discovered.

I've seen pics of "W" riding a road bike, but never a mountain bike. You should have popped in to asked "W" for a police escort and to see if the man has skillz...


F James said...

1st of All. Least Coast? Katie Compton came from over here, so . . .

2. Met and spoke with Collin today at the race (I was one of the race organizers). Collin is a really cool kid and I am glad he came out to race with us. He got along well with everyone there and had a sweet 6th place finish in the Pro race (Chris Eataugh 1st). Real nice guy.

Walt said...

Ok, ok, the least coast thing was a bit too much... I love New England, so I shouldn't talk so much trash.

Got a race report from Collin coming that has some VERY positive things to say about racing in the eastern half of our fair land!